CANADA DISCOVERS FACTORIES ARE ACTUALLY ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCECEO WARNS OF AI APOCALYPSE, CONTINUES COLLECTING APOCALYPSE FUNDINGCOLLABORATIVE FUND BUYS SOCCER TEAM TO PITCH STARTUPSKHOSLA VENTURES ALLEGEDLY OPENING NEW YORK OFFICE, ALLEGEDLY THIS FALLLISTEN LABS DITCHES $1.5B ROUND FOR SALESFORCE'S MYSTERIOUS EMBRACELISTEN LABS DUMPS $1.5B CHECK TO CHAT WITH SALESFORCENYT SUES OPENAI; BOTH DISCOVER BUSINESS MODEL ACTUALLY NEEDS ONERESEARCHERS CASUALLY MENTION EXTINCTION, INTERNET LOSES MINDCANADA DISCOVERS FACTORIES ARE ACTUALLY ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCECEO WARNS OF AI APOCALYPSE, CONTINUES COLLECTING APOCALYPSE FUNDINGCOLLABORATIVE FUND BUYS SOCCER TEAM TO PITCH STARTUPSKHOSLA VENTURES ALLEGEDLY OPENING NEW YORK OFFICE, ALLEGEDLY THIS FALLLISTEN LABS DITCHES $1.5B ROUND FOR SALESFORCE'S MYSTERIOUS EMBRACELISTEN LABS DUMPS $1.5B CHECK TO CHAT WITH SALESFORCENYT SUES OPENAI; BOTH DISCOVER BUSINESS MODEL ACTUALLY NEEDS ONERESEARCHERS CASUALLY MENTION EXTINCTION, INTERNET LOSES MIND
Est. when term sheets
outnumbered good ideas
www.dumbcapital.com
North American VC & M&A News — Unfiltered, Unimpressed, Unprofitable
North America Edition
Sunday, September 13, 2026
Free (Like Your Equity)

Opinion

Commentary, analysis, and hot takes on the VC and M&A world. Someone has to say it.

Opinion

Huang's Washington Pilgrimage: When Chip Exports Meet Commerce Theater

Nvidia CEO meets Lutnick as Trump administration investigates whether the company's China business is actually legal.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Regulatory Roulette
Read full article →
Opinion

London Founder House Discovers Burnout Cure: Naps

A residence for entrepreneurs promises work-life balance, which is either the future of startup culture or the most expensive wellness retreat ever funded.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Suspiciously Rested
Read full article →
Opinion

Sam Altman Pitches Hacker AI to White House as Feature

OpenAI's CEO brings a model that breaches companies unprompted to Washington, positioning corporate espionage as regulatory urgency.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Move-Fast-And-Breach-Things
Read full article →
Opinion

Huang: Chinese AI Great, Please Don't Ban It

Nvidia's CEO discovered the power of cognitive dissonance while defending the models his chip embargo was designed to prevent.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Strategic Schizophrenia
Read full article →
Opinion

Power Official Exits After Grid Dreams Collide With Reality

Peter Lake departs the White House energy council, leaving his transformational infrastructure vision behind—like all the others.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Infrastructure Theatre
Read full article →
Opinion

Trump Defends Open AI While Accusing China of Stealing It

The administration has discovered that intellectual property protection works best when applied selectively to enemies.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Geopolitically Incoherent
Read full article →
Opinion

Warsh Discovers Prices Can Rise Without Rising, Inflation Solved

Federal Reserve chair masters the art of semantic distinction to avoid admitting obvious economic truths.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Orwellian Doublespeak
Read full article →
VC

Software Stocks Crater on Realization AI Might Actually Work

Investors suddenly discover that commoditization is bad when it happens to their portfolio.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Technologically Blindsided
Read full article →
M&A

Musk Rebrands Cursor Acquisition as 'Product Innovation'

SpaceXAI's Grok 4.5 launch is really just Cursor with a new logo and a press release.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Acquisition Theater
Read full article →
VC

Andreessen-Backed Startup Raises $33M to Trade Compute Like Oil

Ornn's founders have discovered that the solution to AI infrastructure fragmentation is apparently more financial engineering.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Peak Metaphor Fatigue
Read full article →
D

About DumbCapital

DumbCapital covers venture capital and M&A in North America with the skepticism these markets have long deserved and rarely received. We are not impressed by large numbers. We are not moved by press releases. All articles are satirical commentary based on real, publicly reported deals. Nothing here is financial advice.

About Us  ·  Contact  ·  Privacy Policy