Immigration crackdowns don't create jobs for U.S. workers—they just make founders angrier at policy.
Read full article →Founders celebrate business models with built-in obsolescence, joking nervously about foundation models eating their lunch.
Read full article →Founders have admitted their entire business model expires the moment a large language model learns to do their job.
Read full article →Nvidia, Microsoft, and Amazon are expanding classified military AI systems despite multiple groups flagging the existential risks of automating lethal judgment calls.
Read full article →The man who wanted to move fast and break things now claims he's civilization's AI conscience.
Read full article →GigCapital7 needs $19.3M in 'non-redemption agreements' to keep the lights on through Hadron Energy closing.
Read full article →Legacy automaker bets quarterly fund on buzzwords while its track record suggests it couldn't successfully acquire a successful software company if one volunteered.
Read full article →Microsoft's former CEO admits to being 'duped' by fraudster founder, proving that billions in capital and decades in tech offer no immunity to basic gullibility.
Read full article →Pentagon's chief AI officer commits to 'country-agnostic' black boxes, proving that national security strategy is just procurement with a flag pin.
Read full article →JPMorgan's CEO issues apocalyptic forecast while his balance sheet whispers: 'Everything is fine.'
Read full article →DumbCapital covers venture capital and M&A in North America with the skepticism these markets have long deserved and rarely received. We are not impressed by large numbers. We are not moved by press releases. All articles are satirical commentary based on real, publicly reported deals. Nothing here is financial advice.