AGE IS NOW A BUSINESS MODEL, APPARENTLYANTHROPIC IPOS INTO THE VOID AS CUSTOMERS DISCOVER BUYER'S REMORSEGOOGLE ADMITS IT HAS NO IDEA WHAT AI IS WORTHGROQ PIVOTS AWAY FROM HARDWARE IT NEVER SOLDNVIDIA DISCOVERS PCS EXIST, PANICS INTO NEW MARKETANTHROPIC BECOMES WORTH MORE THAN TOYOTA, ZERO REVENUE DISCLOSEDBOX CEO DIAGNOSES INDUSTRY'S AI DELUSION, IRONICALLYCLICKHOUSE INNOVATES BY DOING THE INSANE: ACTUALLY MAKING MONEYAGE IS NOW A BUSINESS MODEL, APPARENTLYANTHROPIC IPOS INTO THE VOID AS CUSTOMERS DISCOVER BUYER'S REMORSEGOOGLE ADMITS IT HAS NO IDEA WHAT AI IS WORTHGROQ PIVOTS AWAY FROM HARDWARE IT NEVER SOLDNVIDIA DISCOVERS PCS EXIST, PANICS INTO NEW MARKETANTHROPIC BECOMES WORTH MORE THAN TOYOTA, ZERO REVENUE DISCLOSEDBOX CEO DIAGNOSES INDUSTRY'S AI DELUSION, IRONICALLYCLICKHOUSE INNOVATES BY DOING THE INSANE: ACTUALLY MAKING MONEY
Est. when term sheets
outnumbered good ideas
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Wednesday, June 3, 2026
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VC Deals

Venture capital funding rounds, startup valuations, and the eternal optimism of people spending other people's money.

VC

Trump's Pot Reclassification: A Regulatory Gift Wrapped in Optimism

Nothing says 'investment thesis' like a Wednesday announcement that will conjure ten thousand cannabis startups by Friday.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Regulatory Euphoria Syndrome
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VC

Wojcicki Sisters Launch Healthcare AI Fund, Solve Nothing

Two powerful women discover that combining healthcare and AI is actually a viable business model, not a recurring Silicon Valley fever dream.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Peak Demographic Overlap
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VC

AI Startups Discover They're Just Waiting to Die

Founders openly admit their entire business model is a temporal buffer before the inevitable.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Self-Aware Zombies
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VC

Family Offices Skip VCs, Rush Directly Into AI Meat Grinder

Why pay a VC 2% to lose your money when you can do it yourself?

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Peak Greed Cycle
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VC

VCs Beg Anthropic for Privilege of Losing Money at $800B

The market's most desperate suitors keep getting rejected, and somehow this is being treated as good news.

💀💀💀💀  4/5 — Frothy and Delusional
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D

About DumbCapital

DumbCapital covers venture capital and M&A in North America with the skepticism these markets have long deserved and rarely received. We are not impressed by large numbers. We are not moved by press releases. All articles are satirical commentary based on real, publicly reported deals. Nothing here is financial advice.

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